BEYOND THE BASELINE

Some individuals, struggling with their own relationship prospects, attempt to create a "baseline" for future success by intensely scrutinizing existing, long-standing marriages. They delve into these relationships, evaluating and analyzing the dynamics between husband and wife, formulating theories, and questioning every aspect in an effort to avoid the pitfalls they perceive in their own short-term or non-existent romantic lives.

These "researchers" often criticize both partners in the observed marriages, seeking to identify both positive and negative attributes. They believe they are learning from the experiences of elders, hoping to bypass the "hard way" of learning through personal trial and error.

While these individuals may find the process entertaining and genuinely learn from the successes and failures of long-term relationships, the main issue is the significant harm inflicted upon those who become the subjects of this "experiment."

These couples are treated as "lab mice," constantly observed and analyzed 24/7, their emotions and well-being disregarded for the benefit of the observers. This leads to them suffering, feeling bullied, and being abused by having their lives exploited in this manner.

However, observing and criticizing other marriages, whether successful or failed, cannot simulate or genuinely prepare someone for their own relationship.