THE SHADOW OF STATUS

I often look back to my younger years when I was first searching for a job. Even then, I noticed a strange, recurring pattern: if you already had a job, you were in high demand. But if you were unemployed, you were often dismissed as "unqualified" before anyone even glanced at your resume or sat you down for an interview.

As time went on, I realized this pattern wasn't restricted to the workplace—it bled into our personal lives, too.

In relationships, the logic was just as flawed. If someone was already in a partnership—even a toxic or unhappy one—they were viewed as a "success." Others suddenly found them more attractive or worthy. Yet, if a woman was single, she was often cast as a "failure" by default. At the time, we didn't fully grasp how unfair this environment was. We just lived in it.

It wasn't until I started writing and observing the world with more intention that I saw how deep these assumptions run. This unfair judgment follows us through every stage of life:

 * The Professional: You are only as good as your current title.

 * The Personal: Your worth is tied to your relationship status.

 * The Retired: Once you stop working, society treats you as if you’ve committed a crime—suddenly, you are seen as "unqualified" for life itself.

There is a coldness in how society treats those it deems "extra." People treat the elderly as if they occupy an "unpleasant status," forgetting the most basic law of time: Life moves faster than we realize. Those who judge others for being jobless, single, or old are ignoring their own future. Tomorrow, they will be the ones without the job, the ones outside of the relationship, or the ones facing the quiet of retirement. We are all just one sunset away from being the person we once looked down upon.

"We judge others by their current status, forgetting that status is a temporary shadow cast by time."

PERSONHOOD OVER GENDER

 In every industry—from the construction site to the courtroom—we are surrounded by a vocabulary of the past. We hear terms like manpower, foreman, and man-hours. While many dismiss these as "just words," they are actually the lingering echoes of a world that once decided men were the sole architects of business and society.

​We are finally witnessing a shift. In progressive circles, "manpower" is becoming person-power, "foreman" is becoming supervisor, and "man-hours" are becoming person-hours. This isn't just about being "correct"; it’s about acknowledging that expertise does not have a gender.

​However, we are also facing a fierce "pushback." There are still those who insist that being a man is synonymous with power and supervision. In my own journey through law, medicine, and finance, I have seen men in critical positions use their gender as an excuse to "teach a woman a lesson," or worse, to sabotage her work because they believe power is a male birthright.

​For years, I wondered where this desperate need for dominance came from. I eventually realized that this mentality starts long before a man enters an office. It begins in the home.

​In many societies, women still live in male-dominated environments where marriage is treated like a hierarchy rather than a partnership. When a man is raised to believe he must be the "boss" of his home without question, he naturally tries to control the women in his professional life under the guise of "manpower."

​The most frustrating part of this journey has been the judgment I faced after my separation. I encountered a "shallow group" of people—both men and women—who tried to evaluate my life based on the absence of a man. To them, a woman living without a man is "weak," "needy," or "desperate."

​Even more insulting is the "Mystery Man" myth: the idea that if a woman is successful, her accomplishments must secretly be credited to a man behind the scenes. This is a deliberate attempt to prove that women are incapable of holding power on their own.

​The interference these groups try to run in our lives—the constant questioning of our strength and the credit given to men for our hard work—is more than just an annoyance. It is a form of harassment.

​We are not "needy" because we are alone; we are powerful because we have chosen to define ourselves. It is time we retire the vocabulary of the past and start recognizing power for what it truly is: a matter of character and skill, not a gendered legacy.

BEYOND THE BETRAYAL: WHY I REFUSE TO LEAVE

 Thank you for your thoughtful questions and for engaging so deeply with my story in my book ( Can we talk ). Many of you have asked if, given the hardships I’ve faced, I regret moving to Canada. It is a complex question that deserves a clear answer.

​In my book, I shared the pain of trusting my ex-husband’s promise of a shared future, only to be told that if I couldn't find work, I should return to Iran alone. To be left behind after years of building a life—especially during a period of illness and job loss—was a profound betrayal of that initial trust.

​However, it is important to distinguish between the regret of a personal relationship and my commitment to my life here. While I have faced long-term discrimination and a toxic environment that authorities have yet to fully address, I am not willing to leave.

​I have spent decades in Canada. This is where I have stood up for my rights and where I continue to demand the dignity and professional respect I deserve. My journey is no longer about the person who brought me here; it is about the person I have become while staying here. I am staying to see my fight for justice through and to ensure that the time I have invested in this country is honored.

​I hope this clarifies my perspective and helps you understand the strength behind my decision to stay.

A RESPONSE TO NONSTOP HARASSMENT

 It has come to my attention that a significant amount of energy is being spent by strangers—people I do not know and who have no place in my private life—to speculate on my relationships. This has moved beyond simple gossip; the constant creation of theories and the linking of my every move to a past or current partner has become a form of emotional and mental abuse.

To clarify once and for all:

 * Regarding my Ex-Husband: We have no interest or plans to reunite. We have both decided that separate lives are in our best interest, and we are both living better for it.

 * Current Status: I am not currently in a relationship, nor do I have any plans to enter one. My focus remains entirely on my professional life and my writing.

It is clear that these attacks on my personal life are a tactic to stop me from posting my political opinions. To those who try to threaten me with "Do not tell," or who respond to my social posts and books by attacking my character: Stop this abusive approach.

I am an independent writer. I will continue to write and say whatever I believe needs to be said. Your attempts to create a toxic environment—including the "echoing voices" and threats in my own home—only prove that what I am saying contains a truth you are desperate to cover up.

This pattern of abuse has unfortunately extended into my neighborhood, the healthcare system, telecommunications, and even legal structures.

 * If you do not like my writing, simply do not read it. Leave it for those who value the work and need an outsider eyes for improving society and countries. 

 * Those who are open to critics and listen to an Independent voice , stop this unpleasant threatening. My life is not a targeted project, and my voice will not be silenced by abusers gossip.

CONDOLENCES TO THE PEOPLE OF IRAN

 To the people of Iran, and to all those mourning the loss of loved ones, and fellow citizens:

I wish to offer my deepest and most sincere condolences. The loss of those who stood up for their convictions and their dignity is a profound tragedy that resonates far beyond borders. Their courage and their stories are held in solemn remembrance.

May the families find strength in their shared memory, and may the collective grief of the nation find a path toward healing and solace. My thoughts are with every individual carrying the weight of this loss.

OFFICIAL CLARIFICATION: I AM SAM SMITH

 Just a quick "identity check" for those who are new here! I’ve heard a few rumors that I have a twin or that a man is behind my books. While I'm flattered by the mystery, the truth is much simpler:  I am the sole voice behind the name Sam Smith.

"Sam Smith" is the pen name I use for all my writing. Whether you know me by my real name or my pen name, please know that I am a solo, independent author. "Every word, plot twist, and character comes directly from me—no twins, no ghostwriters, and no committee."

Furthermore, I want to address the unpleasant and incorrect assumptions being made about my personal life. Any move I make—whether related to people or projects—is my own. I live for myself, and my personal life is not connected to any specific group or individual. I kindly ask that you respect my independence as both a person and a creator.

THE SHADOW POWER OF SILENCE: RETHINKING DIGITAL VISIBILITY

 The old expression "do not be scared of those who are loud, be scared of those who are quiet" has taken on a chilling new meaning in the digital era. Historically, this proverb suggested that loud people vent their frustrations openly, while quiet people might be calculating their next move. Today, this social dynamic has evolved into a dangerous power imbalance involving public presence, cyber harassment, and underground activities.

In our current culture, having an active online profile is often treated as an invitation for scrutiny. When a person is public, sharing their thoughts and information, they become a soft target. Because their lives are documented and accessible, they are frequently subjected to harassment, abuse, or coordinated cyberattacks.

There is a disturbing logic at play here: many believe that because someone is "loud" or visible, they are fair game. This transparency is often mistaken for a lack of power, making the individual appear vulnerable to those who wish to cause harm from the safety of the shadows.

On the flip side, we are seeing the rise of a culture that equates a lack of digital presence with hidden strength or "underground" authority. By remaining off the grid and staying quiet, certain individuals or groups cultivate an aura of mystery that commands fear.

As you have noted, some use this lack of a media profile as a deliberate cover. While many stay offline for simple privacy, a more dangerous segment uses this total anonymity to facilitate illegal activities. Because they have no footprint, they are difficult to track, making them the silent "center of fear" in many communities. They understand the cultural bias that the quietest person in the room is the most dangerous, and they use that perception to operate without accountability.

This divide creates a toxic environment. It suggests that if you choose to participate in public life, you must accept being a target, while those who hide away are granted a form of "untouchable" status. This culture rewards those who operate in the dark and punishes those who are honest and open.

When groups deliberately use their lack of profile to shield illegal or harmful behavior, they are exploiting a gap in how we understand power. The "quiet ones" are not always just being private; sometimes, they are utilizing the fear of the unknown to maintain control and avoid the consequences of their actions.