ENOUGH IS ENOUGH: CLARIFYING THE FACTS AND BOUNDARIES

 Good morning. You know me from my articles on this website and my books.

Today, I am posting this article to put an end to rumors that have been spread everywhere for the last 15 years. The mental and emotional harassment became so bad that I moved to another city, but I notice that even here, those rumors are everywhere.

Certain individuals, in an effort to cover up their nonstop harassment, are using my book characters—mostly from my book Waiting Eyes on the Road—by spreading 24/7 rumors assuming that I am waiting for my book character, that he is real and supporting me, or that he even pays me money. This rumor is too ridiculous to even answer, but since harassers are following me even to my new city and my new home, I have to disclose their abusive assumptions.

Another rumor they are spreading is that I am dying to take my ex back, which is absolutely not true. As I have mentioned many times in my previous posts, we are two adults and have no need for a third party to tell or direct us to reunite or stay separated. If those abusers must know, there is no plan for reuniting.

Another rumor I have noticed is that I regret my separation and that I feel every step I take after it is a mistake. Again, if you must know, I lived with my husband for decades, and while we have many memories, regret is not one of them. We have two daughters together, and separation does not change the facts that we lived a long time together and love our daughters.

A fourth rumor is that some individuals are following me everywhere to criticize my choices, pretending my book characters left me for whatever habit I have. That is, again, too ridiculous to answer, but this emotional abuse is nonstop, and I have to clarify.

For the hundredth and final time: all my books are fictional. I created my characters; they are not real, with the exception of my book Can We Talk, which is my true story.

I am asking for the hundredth time: stop this nonsense and stay out of my personal life.

ALBERT EINSTEIN AND THE RELATIVITY OF HUMAN LIFE

 I was studying Albert Einstein's theories of relativity and comparing them to our daily lives. Einstein said, "There is no such thing as absolute rest in the universe; you can only ever measure your speed compared to something else." It is an incredibly valuable theory. We have all experienced sitting in an airplane feeling no motion at all, or riding a bicycle and feeling a rushing sense of speed. These are perfect everyday examples of relativity. [1, 2, 3]

What drove me to review his theories was noticing how certain individuals behave. Some people believe they are incredibly fast, wealthy, healthy, or whatever other positive adjective they like to tag themselves with. The worst part is that they try to rub it in other people's faces to feel superior. On the flip side, there are many people who look up from a lower position, compare their lives to these individuals, and claim they should be living that exact same way—even believing they have a right to criticize you for not having what you have.

I want to be very clear here: everything is relative. You might be incredibly wealthy compared to one group of people, yet considered completely average—or even poor—by another group. To see this in action, you only need to look at billionaires. They are billionaires, so of course they are wealthy. However, when you compare them to other billionaires, some of them are not even considered rich anymore.

The exact same logic applies to being poor or living in poverty. Some individuals are considered poor compared to an average person. Others might actually be richer than the average person, but because they compare themselves strictly to the upper class, they view themselves as poor.

This brings me right back to Einstein's theory. There is no such thing as an "absolute" standard for anything. It is not just about speed; it applies to wealth, health, education, and smartness. Everything is relative. 

How about we just live our own lives? If we feel richer, healthier, happier, younger or wealthier, we should simply enjoy our life without rubbing it in someone else's face. On the other hand, if we feel poor, sick, slow, old or sad, instead of bothering others and interrupting their lives, we should focus on improving our own circumstances. After all, no one else is responsible for our life except ourselves.

THE COST OF SPEAKING TRUTH TO POWER

 As many of you know, my writing focuses on social and political issues. My motivation is twofold: first, I have personally experienced and suffered from these problems; second, I want to bring them to the attention of those in power so they can take action and fix them.

Unfortunately, instead of addressing the actual issues, many individuals have taken to following me everywhere, digging into my private life, and harassing my family—all under the absurd guise of "shedding light" on my situation. Worse yet, radio and television channels are using deceptive advertising and coverage to actively encourage the public to criticize and target me.

What is completely ridiculous is that a person's private life is their own territory. Whether I am fat or thin, rich or poor, living alone or in a relationship, healthy or sick, and a hundred other personal matters—it is nobody’s business but my own. My personal choices belong solely to me and do not infringe on anyone else. Democracy means having the freedom to live as you choose as long as you do not harm or interfere with others. Yet, for the last 15 years, media platforms and individuals have targeted my personal choices and privacy to criticize me 24/7.

It appears that certain political figures are using these media outlets and individuals to orchestrate this nonsense, aiming to intimidate writers and prevent us from exposing real issues.

I ask them directly: Is not the fundamental purpose of an opposition in any political system to highlight problems so they can be fixed? If so, why are you using the broadcast system, media, and the public to stalk me everywhere—even inside my own home—to report on my personal life?

Whether I am in a relationship or divorced, whether I have money or not, these personal details have zero impact on the public, the country, or society. Your political failures and negligence, however, do.

FROM MY LIBRARY TO YOURS

 

MY FAMILY IS NOT YOUR SHIELD: STOP THE FALSE PRETENSES AND VERBAL ABUSE

 For the past 15 years, I have been subjected to relentless verbal abuse and harassment wherever I go. The perpetrators have targeted me by misusing the characters from my book, and they cowardly cover up their mental and verbal assaults by pretending the abuse is coming from my family or my ex-husband. Because I know my family deeply, and because I lived with my ex-husband long enough to know his character, I know with absolute certainty that they would never say the horrific things these bullies claim they are saying.

This situation perfectly illustrates a well-known idiom: "It is done in your name, but to someone else’s favor." These individuals mask their own malice and shift the blame by falsely linking their abuse to the people closest to me. They use the manipulative excuse, "There is no solution for what you and your family created," which is nothing more than a psychological tactic designed to maintain control and justify their bullying.

For 15 years, I have repeatedly turned to the justice system, pleading for them to intervene and stop this targeted harassment. Yet, they have completely neglected to control this abuse. I have been under constant attack for absolutely no reason, while the perpetrators continue to hide behind the false pretense that they are speaking on behalf of my family, friends, or ex-husband.

This relentless campaign is a direct, retaliatory critique of my book, "Can We Talk"—which is a true story documenting misconduct, racism, and abuse within workplaces and by certain service providers. Unfortunately, the justice system has not only failed to stop this ongoing harassment, but by consistently ignoring my complaints, they have signaled to these abusers that their actions carry absolutely no consequences.

WHEN CRITIQUE TURNS INTO "MONKEY BUSINESS"

 When a writer writes a book, they create characters and take them on a unique journey. It is obvious that not every character will have an acceptable personality, just as no single book is meant for every reader.

However, what is entirely unacceptable is when certain individuals read your book and, out of disapproval or critique, choose to follow the author everywhere. They engage in "monkey business" by sarcastically mimicking her words, her posture, and her actions. I refer you to this article about monkey business to better understand the shallow and immature behavior of these critics—behavior that I, as a writer, personally have been facing for a decade.

https://grammarist.com/idiom/monkey-business/

TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE !

I have noticed, once again, certain individuals attempting to weaponize my articles against me. They falsely claim that their wrongdoing and harassment are somehow a reflection of my family, my ex-partner, or my siblings. Let me be entirely clear: you are an abuser. You are following my children, my family, and me simply to cover up your past or future harassment.

If anyone related to me had actually done what you claim, and you were not just fabricating stories to cover your own false acts, you would at least be able to provide an exact location, time, and situation. As I have explained before, everything must be defined by its specific context.

To give you an example: If you try to copy someone’s happiness by watching how they behave at a wedding, and then you mimic those exact actions and feelings at a funeral, you aren't covering up your mistakes. Instead, the host of the funeral is just left confused as to why you are laughing and celebrating. In that exact same way, I have been left confused for years by your unusual and unacceptable behavior.

Another unbelievable tactic I have witnessed is these individuals searching for anything they can find in my past to justify their unauthorized intrusion into my private life, crossing the line over and over again. I have explained countless times that my books are creations of my own thoughts and that my characters are not real. I have explicitly told these groups to stop their investigations, assumptions, guesses, and predictions. Yet, it seems they are too deeply entrenched in their abusive mindsets to understand that reality is not dictated by their theories. The true reality is that their behavior is disturbing, abusive, and an invasion of privacy.

I do not know why they are so obsessed with my personal life, but it clearly stems from my work as a writer. By shedding light on issues they prefer to keep hidden, I have made myself a target for those trying to find something damaging in my own life.

Let me emphasize this: Addressing public issues is completely different from digging into someone’s private life. My work as a writer and journalist aims to expose unresolved societal issues, which is my job. Your actions, on the other hand, are unethical and illegal.

Furthermore, you aren't even uncovering actual secrets; you are simply inventing abusive, insulting theories and targeting me for years based on them. You claim my daughters, my ex, or my family did something—or, in some cases, you invent a mysterious person to blame or admire for my efforts . I have constantly corrected you, telling you that your assumptions are entirely wrong. Perhaps it is your own family that has committed these acts, and you are projecting and seeking revenge on me just to feel better about yourselves. I have recommended many times that you seek professional help; this constant following, copying, assuming, guessing, testing, and accusing is not curing your pathology, yet you continue to do it.

A final word: If there were actually anything wrong in my past, you surely would have found it by now. You have spent the last 15 years digging into my life, testing every breath I take, and accusing me with every step I take. The fact that you have found nothing proves that your theories are entirely baseless. Hey perhaps I am too good to be true !