BEFORE AND AFTER GAME

 Life is often punctuated by profound incidents—car accidents, natural disasters like earthquakes or volcanoes, the death of a loved one, or the pain of divorce—that fundamentally alter our existence. These events are shaped by a complex interplay of our environment, the judgment of others, and our brain's primal psychological drive to survive.

While society and support organizations typically aim to help survivors cope, there is a darker, more destructive response that occasionally emerges: the "Before and After" game.

In many cases, instead of offering empathy, people create a judgmental environment by constantly comparing the victim’s current state to who they were before the incident. This behavior is deeply damaging because:

 * Erasure of Identity: By insisting the "before" life no longer belongs to the victim, observers isolate the survivor from their own history.

 * Victim Blaming: Judgmental people often begin to question why the disaster happened to that specific person, eventually suggesting there was something "wrong" with the victim to have "attracted" such misfortune.

 * Impossible Expectations: There is often a cruel expectation for the victim to "get back to who they were," ignoring the reality that deep trauma fundamentally changes a person’s chemistry and outlook.

The Consequences of Social Pressure

When a survivor is denied moral and emotional support and is instead met with constant scrutiny, the results can be catastrophic:

 * Mental Health Collapse: The pressure can lead to extreme isolation or, in tragic cases, thoughts of self-harm.

 * A Breakdown in Justice: If the legal or social justice systems join in this "comparison game" rather than addressing the harm, the victim may lose faith in society and feel forced to take matters into their own hands.

 * The Birth of Resentment: By trying to force a victim back into their past self through isolation and shame, the "players" of this game don’t realize they are actually fostering a permanent sense of hatred and a desire for revenge.

The journey of a survivor is already paved with unpredictability and pain. To add the weight of social judgment—blaming someone for an illness, a natural disaster, or a loss they could not control—is a form of secondary abuse. True support requires acknowledging that a person cannot simply "return" to the past; they must be allowed to heal into their new reality without being haunted by the ghost of who they used to be.

To wrap up, we must confront a harsh reality: the secondary victimization that occurs after a tragedy is often as damaging as the initial act.

​Whether it stems from judgmental commentary by strangers who never knew the victim, the systemic ignorance of a rigid justice system, or the manipulative "games" played by friends and family—the impact is the same. Comparing traumas or shifting blame onto the person who suffered is not just a social failing; it is a form of psychological abuse.

​It is time for our legal frameworks to stop being passive observers or unwitting participants in this cycle. The law should serve as a shield against this "after-game," criminalizing the harassment and character assassination that so often follows a victim. Instead of joining the fray, the system must evolve to dismantle this unpleasant process, ensuring that the pursuit of justice does not become a second site of trauma.

NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR

 It is necessary for me to address a persistent and disruptive misinterpretation of my work. For some time now, my posts, books, blogs, and magazine contributions have been subjected to baseless scrutiny by individuals and investigators who claim my writing is targeted toward a specific, "mysterious" person.

I want to be unequivocally clear: I am a professional writer. My work focuses on social and political themes, intended for public discourse and professional engagement.

While any reader is free to interpret literature or articles through their own lens, the current assumptions being circulated are no longer just matters of opinion—they are interfering with my personal and professional life.

 * No Hidden Agendas: My writing is not a tool for "searching" for someone, nor is it a cry to be "found."

 * No Mystery: The people who need to know my location already do. Similarly, the people I communicate with in my personal life are not "mysterious" figures; they are known to me through normal, transparent channels.

 * Professional Integrity: Assuming that my writing contains 'coded' or hidden messages for a specific person is a form of sabotage. It is a deliberate attempt to distract readers and prevent them from engaging with the actual political and social messages I intend to deliver.

 Final Note: I am asking for an end to these abusive assumptions. My purpose as a writer is to engage with the world on a professional level, not to participate in a fictional narrative created by others.

END THE CHILDISH GAMES

 It is an undeniable and bitter truth that war—regardless of its scale—inevitably leads to injury, death, and profound loss. This is precisely why international organizations exist: to mediate and prevent conflict before it begins.

​If we narrow the scope from global warfare down to a country, a society, or even a single family, the principle remains the same. Prevention is always superior to recovery. It is far better to stop a fight before it starts than to suffer the consequences and spend years trying to heal or find a solution.

​Unfortunately, there is a specific type of person or group that thrives on instability. Rather than resolving issues through civil dialogue, they intentionally create friction to force a situation into the hands of police, lawyers, or the courts.

​This behavior is problematic for several reasons:

• ​Weaponizing the System: They use legal and law enforcement resources as a personal tool for harassment rather than a path to justice.
• ​Toxic Environments: By purposefully creating an abusive atmosphere, they force others into a "fight" or "flight" response.
• ​The "Cowboy and Cop" Mentality: This behavior is fundamentally childish. It mimics a game of "cops and robbers," where those who profit from the chaos cast themselves in whatever role suits their narrative at the moment.

​Perhaps the most damaging aspect of this "game" is how it affects actual law enforcement and the justice system. While these bullies are busy playing out their manufactured dramas, they often actively question the integrity of real investigators.

​They use this noise as a smokescreen. By casting doubt on serious investigations, they hope to ensure that their own hidden mistakes, harassment, and toxic behavior remain undisclosed. It is a calculated effort to stay protected by the very systems they are manipulating.

INTERNAL WAR VS. EXTERNAL DEFENSE

 Although I live outside of Iran and cannot witness the day-to-day reality behind the international headlines, I believe that every political or social movement begins with a long-ignored issue. These problems often fester quietly within the system, unnoticed by high-level authorities. However, when an issue remains active but hidden for too long, it eventually erupts—spreading rapidly like an epidemic.

​This phenomenon is not limited to the Middle East or any specific region; it is a human reality that could happen anywhere, perhaps closer than we think.

​Unfortunately, when too much time passes and the severity of an issue is left unaddressed, it can spiral out of control. This leads to:

• ​Both authorities and the public face injury and hardship.

• ​The country suffers the deep scars of an internal "war" or domestic conflict.

• ​ Internal instability often weakens borders, inviting outside nations to intervene—some to offer genuine help, others to exploit the situation for their own benefit.

​In many ways, an internal fight is more dangerous than an external war. It creates a fundamental separation among citizens, causing them to turn their anger and power against one another instead of uniting against outside threats. Such movements have a profound impact on:

• ​The Economy: Infrastructure and markets are often the first to suffer.

• ​Societal Safety: The daily security of the people is compromised.

• ​Border Security: A divided nation is a vulnerable nation.

​Because I live abroad, I cannot sit in judgment of the Iranian movement. However, it is my hope that those involved consider every aspect of the long-term effects these movements will have on their lives and the future of their country.

DAY, NIGHT, AND THE MASK OF REALITY

 ​The cycle of day and night is one of life’s few constants. We understand that the sun allows us to see clearly, while the darkness of night requires us to find our own light. Both are essential, yet we have a deep-seated, instinctual fear of the dark simply because we cannot see what is happening around us. This natural fear is often exploited.

​In society, certain individuals and groups use the concepts of "dark" and "light" to target others. They manipulate these terms to label people as scary, evil, or "bright" and "good." Those who misuse these natural cycles are the same people who would metaphorically blindfold others to keep them in the dark.

​It is to their benefit that the public remains blind to the reality behind their masks.

​This manipulation often goes beyond simple metaphors and enters the territory of dangerous social labeling:

• ​Geopolitics: Using "day" and "night" to align people with specific countries or political ideologies. ​
• False Dichotomies: Using White to represent peace and Black to represent war, which misleads the public into believing a person's intent based on a label rather than their actions.
• ​Racism and Prejudice: These labels feed the fire of racism, convincing people that one race is superior or that another is a threat to be feared. It can even lead to the public supporting a guilty person or condemning an innocent one based solely on skin color, age, or "labels."

​Labels do not change facts. Calling a war-monger "peaceful" doesn't change the reality of their demands, just as labeling someone "dark" doesn't make them evil.

​We see this misuse everywhere: in the separation of men and women, in the "switching" of words to hide theft, and in the religious or moral labeling of "angels" versus "evils." These are often just tools used to insert wrong ideas into the public consciousness.

It is time to stop those who use these words as weapons. We must look past the labels of night and day, white and black, or young and old. To find the truth, we must remove the blindfolds and judge individuals by their reality, not the "colors" others use to describe them.

OFFICIAL DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENT AUTHORSHIP

 Since the publication of my first book, I have observed a persistent and troubling pattern. Every idea I share—whether in my books, on my blog, or in public comments—is met with the baseless assumption that I am acting on behalf of a specific group, person, or political ideology.

Critics and detractors often attempt to "trace" my thoughts back to imaginary influencers or even to the fictional characters within my own books. I have consistently and publicly stated that I work entirely independently. I am not under any social, political, or financial influence.

It has become clear that linking my work to outside parties is a tactic used to avoid addressing the actual issues I highlight. Instead of resolving the problems of negligence and ignorance I bring to light, it is easier for some to mislead the public by falsely associating my writing with "oppositions," "rioters," or "political agendas."

This sabotage has crossed a line, infiltrating my professional and personal life. Whether I am attending a business meeting or a social gathering—online or in person—there are immediate, false attempts to link my presence or my words to others, specifically my ex-husband.

I am clarifying once again: Nothing I write, file, or post originates from anyone but me. * Identity: I am Sam Smith—author, writer, and blogger.

• Source: My work is the direct result of the harassment, ignorance, and negligence I have faced for the last 20 years—and continue to face at this very moment.

• Independence: I am not, and will never be, under the influence of any external party.

I am calling upon the authorities to put an end to this abusive environment. This harassment has extended into my neighborhood, medical institutions, social gatherings, and beyond.

I understand that the truth can be bitter, but it is the responsibility of every writer to speak it. I demand the right to exist and work as an independent creator without being subjected to these constant, defamatory links to outside parties.

THE PRICE OF INTEGRITY

 ​It is a privilege to contribute to a company using your hard-earned knowledge and skills. However, as an engineer who faced years of discrimination and bullying—and who was forced to resign repeatedly to preserve my integrity—I stand firmly for justice and against toxic work environments.

​There are many who, perhaps due to a lack of awareness regarding work ethics and professional standards, judge those of us who choose to walk away. I often hear the "what if" scenario: “If you hadn't resigned, you would be much wealthier today.”

​While it is true that I received a high salary and held a position of responsibility that I truly loved, that wealth would have come at a soul-crushing price. I was expected to:

• ​Become part of a corrupt system.
• ​Endure mental and emotional stress in an abusive environment.
• ​Remain silent in the face of discrepancies, isolation, and stereotyping.
• ​Accept systemic discrimination and racism.

​Those who follow my articles, blog, and books know that I am not the type of person to remain silent under such circumstances.

​The most telling part of this journey is that even 15 years after leaving those environments, there are still attempts to cover up system failures, corruption, and negligence. They continue to spread misinformation, suggesting to the public and authorities that my objections were not legitimate or that the fault was mine.

​The answer is clear and loud: NO. I was a professional, ethical employee who refused to be complicit in a poisoned work environment. I refused to stay silent about racism and discrimination. Today, I am still standing for my principles and my beliefs, and I do so with my head held high. 

To truly understand the depth of the unnecessary pressure and systemic abuse I endured within these poisoned workplaces, I suggest you read my book, "Can We Talk?". It is the true story of my life and a testament to why I chose my principles over a corrupt system.